Ichiro Suzuki – Padre Killer


At the start of each series, we at Chicken Friars will zero in on an opposing player known to be a “Padre Killer.” No matter the day, time or place, this player is known to be a one-man wrecking crew when it comes to playing against the San Diego Padres.

In this column, I will analyze that player’s statistics against the Friars and try to offer some insight into how not to let that player beat our beloved team.

The Texas Rangers came into Petco Park and showed why they are a force to be reckoned with come playoff time. Now, the Padres will finish interleague play at home against their interleague rival, the Seattle Mariners.

To end interleague play on a positive note, the Padres need a Herculean effort from everyone on their roster. However, against the Seattle Mariners, the strength of the Greek God may not be enough. That is because the Mariners have a Japanese demigod who is not a mythological figure; he is actually real and playing in right field for the Mariners.

This super natural being is a  5’11”  170-pound future Hall of Famer named Ichiro Suzuki, better-known simply as Ichiro.

Ichiro’s super power is that he is a hitting machine. When he plays against the Padres he is just that. No matter if the game is played at PetcoPark, Safeco Field or the moon, Ichiro continues to hit and hit and hit against the Friars.

Here is proof :

Ichiro is destined to get his hits, so there is no stopping him there. What the Padres need to do is not give up anything more than singles because although he is 38-years old , he still has above average speed on the base paths. Base stealing is another dynamic to Ichiro’s game, so if he gets on base on base, Padres pitchers must not let him steal second and third.

Lastly, Ichiro will not just beat the Padres with the bat but with the glove. The 10-time Gold Glove winner has a cannon of an arm. So offensively, the Padres must play small ball or hit the ball away from right field.