September 22, 2012; San Francisco, CA, USA; San Diego Padres third baseman Chase Headley (7) throws the ball to first base during the fifth inning against the San Francisco Giants at AT

Promotions I Wanna See In 2013

The Padres have not announced their promotional schedule for 2013, but I am hoping for some exciting new promotions. The Padres promos were substandard at best in 2012. As stupid as it sounds, promotions are a great, fun way to get fans out to the ballpark. Minor league parks come up with great promotions and I thought it would be fun to come with some ideas to attract y’all to the ballpark. The marketing staff for the Padres can thank me later.

Steroid Night: In honor of Yasmani Grandal’s 50 game suspension, the Padres can cash in on his stupidity. Instead of dwelling on the negative, we will celebrate the events. The give away that night will be a Grandal Pez dispensers. Grandal will have a needle protruding from his backside. The candy will resemble steroid pills. Fun for the whole family.

Hipster Night: We live in San Diego and these interesting folks are all around us. Stupid facial hair, terrible indie music, dumb hats. Let us all embrace this weird subculture. Everyone wearing a douchey mustache gets a deal on a ticket. The Padres can find some terrible bands to play a show after the game.

Bobbleheads: My number one complaint last year was that were no bobbleheads. I love them! 2010 offered several, and there were none last year. How about 4 or 5 bobblehead nights. A Chase Headley bobblehead to celebrate his Silver Slugger and Gold Glove awards? A Chris Denorfia doll making a stupid cool diving catch. Give me my bobbleheads, dag nabit!

T-Shirts: Kansas City does T-shirt Tuesdays, which I think is a great idea. The Padres could take this to the next level by allowing fans to submit their designs. I know a few great artists and it would be amazing to allow them to showcase their talents. Give the winners some free tickets or something.

Arm Sling Night: The Padres have had a rash of pitchers requiring surgery. It has been mighty depressing, however, arm sling night will be a fun promotion. Not only will it keep your arm warm, but you can look just like fallen pitchers Cory Luebke and Joe Wieland. Come back, guys!

Hunting Knife Night: Let’s honor Padres right-hander and redneck Andrew Cashner will be honored with replica hunting knives, celebrating the dopey fireballer who sliced a tendon on his finger “dressing” a deer. If you come in to the ballpark with a gaping, bleeding wound from your hand, you get a left field reserved ticket for just 71 cents! (Cashner’s IQ, probably).

These are just a few of my ideas. Think you can do better? Hit it up in the comments.

Next Padres Game View full schedule »
Sunday, Aug 3131 Aug1:10Los Angeles DodgersBuy Tickets

Tags: Andrew Cashner Chase Headley San Diego Padres

  • Charles Anderson

    I like your ideas, they could also honor their biggest non-pitcher pick-up with a Cody Ransom Bobble head! That would be a sell out as we all can’t wait to see what Cody can do for the Padres. How about a Black & Deck chair night? one lucky fan gets to sit in a deck chair next to Buddy and can wake him up in time to remove the starter who has given up 6 runs in 4 innings, or remind him not to bring in a “walk the park” relief pitcher with the bases loaded! Have a One Direction concert following a game and during the game fans get to vote just which direction Padres are going! Thanks

  • stickman0287

    If you are a Padres fan, why are you ripping on the Padres? This makes no sense to me. You actually had a couple good proposals with local artists for t-shirt designs and more bobble heads, but the other “ideas” were just insulting to the players and in turn, the fans. You may have meant it in jest, but those jokes were in poor taste, especially the joke on Cashner’s IQ just because of a hunting accident.

    I come here to read Padres articles from other Padres fans, not to read more jabs at the players of my team. I get enough of that from Giants and Dodger fans.

  • Kevin Charity

    I am just calling them like I see them and this article was meant to be taken in jest. Cashner is a dope. The guy had a golden opportunity to secure a job in Spring Training, yet decided to reject the Padres request for him to pitch in Winter Ball, and had a STUPID accident.

    As for the rest of your comments, I do not see how the jokes were in poor taste. I am not here to kiss the ass of the players, you can get that at any Padres site. I am here to provide opinions and have fun. That’s what this article was about. I love this team just as much as you, or any other fan for that matter. I appreciate your feedback and your visiting the site. I respectfully disagree, good sir.